Hello friends!!

I hope you all are doing really well. So a little bit about my experience so far. First of all, I can´t explain how happy I am to be here. I couldn´t have hand-picked a more perfect organization to serve with. My fellow missioners are wonderful people, I feel I´ve always known them and am so at home. Even though I´ve only been here a few days, I feel like I´ve been here a long time, probably because our days have been so full of life. Just within the last few days I have visited an orphanage for young girls, gotten to know the Franciscan Friars of the Renewal, went to mass with the cloistered Poor Clares, visited the Missionaries of Charity House, and volunteered at a school for children with disabilities. We don´t know individually where we will all be focusing our time of service, so they are giving us a little taste of everything for right now.

There have been of course, a few struggles, the biggest one being the language barrier. Lets just say I thought I knew a lot more spanish than I actually do! I realize now that I have taken for granted for so long the simple gift of communication, but I am trying everyday to communicate His love in a way besides words, even if it´s just a smile. Tomorrow we are all leaving for two weeks of language school, and all I can say is that I´ve never been more excited to learn Spanish!!

I wanted to share a little reflection with all of you. Tonight all of us Missioners had adoration and praise & worship (in ENGLISH!) with the Franciscan Friars of the Renewal. Afterwards, I went to confession, and the last thing that the Friar told me was: "Remind yourself of your poverty. Don´t be so hard on yourself. Admit that you were wrong before God, and then remember that we are all so small and poor without Him. I mean, there are only so many Therese´s in this world." This made me burst into spontaneous laughter and tears. First of all, I have been reading Mother Teresa´s wrtings, "Come Be My Light", which has led me to feel quite unholy and inadequete. Not to mention the fact that I have been, for a while, completely terrified of St. Therese of Lisieux, which I know is very strange..(in my room here, a huge picture of her face hangs on my wall right across from my bed..coincidence?)

The reason I bring this up, is because I have been led to believe more deeply than ever that we are so blessed to have our poverty, whatever that may be. What then, if not our poverty, brings us to our knees to yearn for Christ? I am going to be controversial, and will go so far as to say that in a mystical way not understood by our world, these poor, suffering, Hondurans are in a way more blessed then us (sorry to say) spoiled Americans. Why? Because it is the poor who are so close to Christ, especally close to Him in His redemptive suffering. They have nothing, but everything. These people have only Christ, much suffering, yet SO much joy. This is such a cliche idea, but it is a reality here. Today I looked into the eyes of a 2-year old orphan girl, (who acted more like a 6-year old American, really), and realized that maybe she has known more suffering than I will ever know. But when I looked into her eyes, I saw only Christ. I am now convinced then, that really the greatest poverty is to make ourselves believe that we are not in great need of our Lord.
I am also coming to see that I have very little to give to these people that they do not already have much more profoundly than I. But the love for Jesus that is in my heart, I will try to share it as abundantly as I can, "To give and not count the cost" -St. Ignatius Loyola. Yet, it will be in very small humble ways, like doing dishes, playing duck, duck, goose (or perro, perro, gato as we call it here..we didn´t know the words for duck, duck, goose in spanish),or allowing Honduran teenagers to laugh at my ridiculous, fumbling spanish. I am soooo blessed to be here, thank you for your prayers! Lots of love coming your way in prayer!!

Adios,
Angie

"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven." Matthew 5:3